As humans we seek validation from others. As much as you like to think you do not I am sure you have gone through life wanting to feel wanted, validated and assured that what you are doing is right in other peoples minds.
Another thing about humans is we like to judge, some more than others but unconsciously we all have lived different lives and will have our own opinions and thoughts on things. It is normal to look at indifference as something foreign and strange to our norm.
You can either look at this as beautiful, interesting and learn from it or you can turn away, judge, bad mouth and talk shit about the way another person is behaving, thinking or enacting their life.
How To Use Judgement As Fuel
Why not flip the script, instead of being hindered by others and the way they judge or talk about what you do in a negative light why not use it to fuel you. Are you training right now but not in the best shape? Walking into a commercial gym and afraid of what people may think? Look let's be honest, people may talk, judge and look down upon others for their body shape but why should you let what someone you will probably never converse with in your life stop you from doing what you want to do?
Starting a business or new venture? Your family and friends unhappy with how you left a job or are okay with starting from the ground up... Life should be lived how you want to live it. Think about it like this...
Who is actually living your life? is it your friends, family and those people in the gym or is it YOU? Don't be afraid of indifference and embrace what makes you unique. That is a true testament to your own true self.
Criticism
When you seek validation you may ask those close to you or people that you associate with for advice or to know that what you are doing is good or just in someone else's mind. How do you take criticism? How do you feel if they disagree with your way of thinking or your actions? Do you take it on board and change or is your ego too proud?
Let your ego be shut down, bring your ego down and accept that not everyone is going to be okay with the things you do. Be okay with being judged and criticised in a negative way cause this will create your biggest teachings.
Being okay with being wrong is going to teach you lessons you did not think you needed to learn.
Use criticism to your advantage and take it in a way that you can grow from it.
Use it as fuel to advance and grow, self develop and make a change.
Do not ever take someones advice and lessons as gospel but a different perspective on what you are currently doing. Use it to make adjustments to your work and life and you will see an advancement in what you are setting out to achieve.
Motivation
There will be times that you receive judgement that does not have anything to do with growth or positive change. Use it in a way to push you forward. As the great Arnold Schwarzenegger said "ignore the naysayers". Ignore the people that say what you are doing is incorrect or wrong and use it to push you towards what you want in your life.
People will always want you to fit their ideal world and live the life they live. But you are different, you should be different and unique! Use this to your advantage and use it to push you towards YOUR road, YOUR life not someone else's.
Ignore the naysays and you will be on the road to success in your own eyes.
Blind Spots
There will be times on your road to self-discovery and success that you may require external assistance... There will be times that another pair of eyes will guide you towards the right path when you drift off. Having people around you that provide constructive criticism and advice will help you identify blind spots that you can use to push you in the right direction again!
Great Support Network
Changing your perspective and view on other people and what they say, think and act around you will help you identify the people you need and want in your life. As you go through life your social circles tends to get smaller, you interact less with a lot of people and more with the people that benefit you more.
This is a positive thing but choosing the right people at the right times is a great skill to have throughout all stages of life.
Ensuring the people you choose create a positive influence on your life will ensure when you start to drift they will bring you up and back on the path you initially created for yourself!
This is the point you create a great support network. People that will provide constructive criticism that will produce positive outcomes rather than derail you.
Closing Thoughts
Judgements are great, being motivated comes and goes.
For me, my top tip is creating a strong social network of like minded people that know when to tell you the road you chose is not the road you are on right now. Being okay with telling you how it is to make a positive change in your life. Listening on and being able to guide you towards your true future rather than their own ideal future they invision for you.
Cut the people that create negativity and push you off your road and welcome people that push you further along your ideal road.
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